It's kind of hard to believe that I've actually already been on my medication for 30 days. I took the final pill in my first vial this morning, immediately upon waking, and washed it down with lots of water, as per the directions. And also, as per the directions, no food for at least half an hour. No calcium or iron supplements for at least four, which means no more multivitamin/fish oil/iron pill supercombo in the morning anymore. There's a lot to remember when you have to put these chemicals in your body every day, and to some extent, it's changed the way I live. I used to religiously take my vitamins every morning after breakfast, but now I can't, since breakfast is usually not eaten four long hours after I wake up and take my pill. And I can't take Centrum anymore, because that has an iodine supplement in it, and iodine, beyond what is found in salt or other naturally-occurring sources, is no longer allowed for me. I've started taking prenatal vitamins again, for a couple of reasons: 1.) That was what they gave us in Peace Corps and I grew to like them. 2.) No iodine component to potentially mess up my thyroid medication. 3.) Prenates make your hair grow, and that remains, even after 30 days of pills, a pretty large problem for me.
The first few days on the meds I was all energy, all the time. It was like I had had four or five cups of coffee, or shots of espresso, all day long. I kind of loved it, actually - I was able to get a lot done and I didn't need to nap or sleep 9 or 10 hours a night. My heart felt like it was beating too quickly at times, sure, but I felt great. Very... caffeinated.
That's worn off some after a month. I don't really need to nap anymore during the day, but while I could get away with 6 hours of sleep some nights at the beginning of the month, by the end I was once again in my "I need at least 8 hours of sleep to function" mode. I remain pretty energetic in the mornings right after I take my pill: usually what I do right after I wake up is clean the kitchen because I feel compelled by some weird energy to get that done, RIGHT AWAY, the minute I get out of bed. I haven't even tasted coffee yet and I'm vacuuming, doing dishes, and scrubbing the stove. The daily clean kitchen is thanks to the meds.
(In some ways, this also might be because I need to have at least some sense of accomplishment for the day, and walking away with a clean kitchen every morning is one way to convince myself that my life is not a total waste, that I am a person who gets things done. This, however, is probably more psychological than medical, and most likely deserves a blog of its own.)
So while my energy level has come back down to "normal" - comps, grad school, and constant pressure might have something to do with that - I'm still feeling quite a bit better in this respect. I'm more energetic and I can stay awake all day. For this, I'm thankful. It's a really nice change.
I've also lost a bit of weight, I think. I don't weigh myself too often, but this month I felt like my weight didn't fluctuate as wildly as it has in the past. I still exercise daily and eat pretty well (moments of weakness include eating fat-free frozen yogurt), but for a long time - as long as I can remember since I started exercising daily in 2003 - my weight wouldn't really change. It was frustrating. I worked so hard and never saw effects. I railed against those stupid women's health magazines that promised to be able to peel away pounds if you just worked hard enough. I thought it was a load of crap - I worked hard! All the time! And I never really lost weight. I've been a fairly steady 130 pounds for... years. And while most of it is muscle, I always thought that, for a 5'4" frame, it was a bit too much.
So while I don't know how much I weigh at the moment, I feel smaller, a bit lighter. I'm not able to work out as much as I'd like right now since comps have whittled my free time down to precious few hours, but I feel like I'm not retaining as much water and that the work I do at the gym or on the roads has started to change my body. Basically, I feel like I'm actually benefitting from my daily exercise the way the body is SUPPOSED to benefit from daily exercise, rather than just plateauing and resisting change.
So this all sounds great, right? More energy, lost weight... the meds must be working! And to a certain extent, they absolutely are. I still feel really thankful that I have a condition that can be aided or healed by taking one little pill every day. I continue to realize how lucky I am.
The problem is the continued hair loss. LOTS of continued hair loss.
My scalp looks better, I can freely admit this. The part in my hair looks less wide, those frightening bald-looking spots less noticeable. My hair feels healthy (no dye!) and looks okay (well, it would if I knew how to style it). But it still comes out all the time. Large handfuls of strands come out in the shower when I wash and condition my hair. I can't run my fingers through it without more strands coming out. Fine blonde hairs cover all my clothing, the carpet, my bed. I'm shedding as much as my dog, which is saying something.
I have a lot of new hair that I can see, short little strands popping up around my part and on the top of my scalp, and maybe this is one reason why I'm still losing so much mature hair. My hair is also growing much more quickly (probably due to the daily prenatal vitamin), and it's grown to a length that hits below my chin MUCH faster than it normally does. But it also falls out just as quick, and it seems to me that it's the longest, thickest strands that come out in the shower - the ones that I have the fewest of! Every time I shampoo and can pull out between 15 and 30 strands of fought-for hair, I just want to cry.
I go back to Dr. Thomas on 10/15, less than a month from now. I'll tell her what's going on and see if I need a higher dose of the meds. I don't believe that I have Aunt Linda's alopecia - certainly I'd be farther along the path to baldness if I did, and my body hair would be falling out too, which isn't happening - but something is still wrong. I just want to be able to run my hand through my hair and not have it then covered in strands that fall out at the slightest touch. Call me vain, and though I'm very thankful for the increased energy and moderate weight loss, the hair loss remains the part that hurts the most. I don't have much hair - I never have - so I'm very protective of these few fine strands that are mine.
